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Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Murphy's Laws for Frequent Flyers

Well ... err... by this time we know that sh!# happens and quite a good amount of money can be made out of it in the process. And, when it comes to talking about shit, I mean, SH!#, Murphy has the sole proprietorship for devising all those laws. Here is a look at Murphy's Laws for Frequent Flyers:

1. No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to catch the flight.

2. If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal.

3. If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed.

4. Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.

5. If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence as soon as you touch pen to paper or finger to keyboard.

6. If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the boarding area. Just look for the two biggest passengers.

7. Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go to the lavatory.

8. The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to you.

9. The best-looking woman on your flight is never seated next to you.

10. The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.

I have experienced empirical proofs to most of these laws. In first person!