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Thursday, December 16, 2010

Top Rajnikanth Jokes .. err... Facts Part 2!

I have to agree that Rajnikanth jokes are much more popular than his movies. After all, an average person like me probably would have seen only a few Rajni movies (in my case, its 3 to be precise), but would have received hundreds, if not thousands, Rajnikanth Jokes through mail or sms. Here's the second installment of the top Rajnikanth jokes.

1. Rajnikanth can charge his charger with his mobile.
2. The missing piece of the Apple Inc.'s logo was eaten by Rajnikanth!
3. When Rajnikanth wants to go abroad, he jumps up from the terrace of his house and waits for the Earth to spin.
4. Intel's new tagline, "Rajnikanth inside!"
5. Once Dinosaurs borrowed money from Rajnikanth and refused to pay him back. That was the last time we heard about the Dinosaurs.
6. Once while having hookah, Rajnikanth made a smoke ring. It went in to the space and is now known as the *Ring of the Saturn*.
7. Rajnikanth's pulse is measured in the Richter Scale.
8. Rajnikanth can speak in Braille.
9. Rajnikanth was once practicing for a Spelling Bee contest. The rough sheets he used are today known as the Oxford dictionary.
10. Rajnikanth can draw a circle with a ruler.
11. Amma, "Beta Rajni, apne solar heater se garam pani nahi aa raha hain."
Rajnikanth, "Yanna Raskala. Ruko amma. Main abhi Suraj ko thik karke aata hoon."
12. Ek khaufnaak andheri raat ke 12 baaje ek Bhoot dusre Bhoot ko samjha raha tha, "Ghabra mat. Yeh sab tera dimaag ka vahem hain, koi Rajnikanth - vajnikanth nahi hota."
13. Rajnikanth's next project has been announced. Its going to be a remake of Titanic in Tamil. Only, the climax has been changed. Both the Hero and Heroine survive along with all the people on board. Rajni swims the Atlantic with the Heroine in one hand and Titanic in the other.
14. Galileo used lamp to study. Graham Bell used candles to study. Shakespeare & Vidyasagar studied under the street light. But Rajnikanth used only *Agarbatti* to study!
15. One day Rajnikanth got angry and kicked his sweeper boy. The boy went flying in the sky with his broom in the hand. We now know him as *Harry Potter*.

As and when I get hold of more such gems, I promise to compile and upload another list.

Top Rajnikanth Jokes .. err... Facts!

Statutory Warning:
"All the jokes in this post have been compiled and collected from secondary sources and does not, in any way, represent the view of the publisher of this blog."

The above bit was necessary to protect me from the wrath of Rajni Anna. :)

Here goes the first list of top Rajnikanth jokes -

1. Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
2. Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.
3. Rajinikanth killed the dead sea.
4. If you spell ‘Rajanikant’ wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Rajinikanth?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”
5. Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano
6. Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque without having sufficient balance in the account. The bank bounced!
7. Micheal Jordan to Rajini, "I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you?"
Rajni, "Rascala; how do you think the earth spins!?"
8. Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of Idli in McDonald’s, and got it.
9. If Rajnikant was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.
10. When Rajnikant logs on to, facebook updates its status message!
11. Rajni once killed 20 men just by saying "BANG"
12. Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
13. Rajinikanth can divide by zero.
14. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity. Twice!
15. When Rajinikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
16. When Rajnikanth pokes you on Facebook, you start bleeding.
17. Rajnikanth has a terrace in his basement.
18. Rajnikanth got shot at yesterday. Today is the bullet's funeral!
19. Once Rajnikanth kicked a donkey on the chin. Its descendants are known as giraffes.
20. Rajnikanth once kicked a football. It now revolves around the Sun and is known as *Pluto*.

More to come...